The Onion News Network informs us of a little-known verdict by the Supremes as their session winds down ("like, whoa, dude!")...
Supreme Court Rules Death Penalty Is 'Totally Badass'
Update: I should have noted that I was going for "cynicism cubed" here in light of this.
...and here they are again with helpful hints on how to handle those oh so annoying, do gooder friends asking you whether or not you've voted in this election year (the Sprint ad is actually pretty funny too).
Today Now!: How To Pretend You Give A Shit About The Election
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