Pick Me! Pick Me! Pick Me!

(Catching up on a few things due to unexpected stuff yesterday…)

I checked out the Huffington Post this morning and saw that our dear friend Bill O’Reilly is going to publish what amounts to an Internet “enemies list” of sites that support his biggest critics (such as Media Matters and Atrios – Think Progress has the details). I had a momentary grade-school flashback (“S’ter! S’ter!) as I contemplated all of this further.

Everyone else can get hung up on the fact that this is an Orwellian convergence of McCarthyite hysteria and Nixonian paranoia for the new media age, but not me, no siree! I’m proud to stand up and take the “hit” for a good cause (several, perhaps even many I hope, especially since I reached my limit for the comment spam with the carpet guy leaving seven of them on Veterans Day to the point where I turned on word verification yesterday).

So, Bill…may I call you “Bill”?...oh all right: Mr. O’Reilly, I have but one request.

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PUT ME ON YOUR LIST!

I’m sorry for all the nasty things I said. I’m sorry for all the ways that I portrayed you as a braying, dogmatic, frothing-at-the-mouth right wing lunatic who continually refuses to entertain an opposing point of view. I’m sorry for continually reminding everyone that you threatened to kill Michael Kinsley. I’m sorry for pointing out that I used pages from “The O’Reilly Factor For Kids” to line my cat’s litter box. Besides, if you took a minute to look around this site, you’d see that I link to the sites that you hate all over the place.

So please put me on your enemies list. I’ve taken so much time and space maligning you that, in all fairness, I think this is the least you can do to pay me back.